And for some viewers, they’re incredibly meaningful.
Hallmark movies are more than just movies to a lot of people.
As one Hallmark screenwriter toldEntertainment Weekly, “All you have to do is diagram it.
Pretty simple, right?
Luckily forHallmark actors, they don’t have to worry about giving a convincing drunk performance.
And it’s by design.
Hallmark movies aim to keep everyone happy.
Ah, to live inside a Hallmark movie.
“‘If I’m not crying, I’m not buying.’
Those were all rules I heard,” Schaler said.
The Hallmark execs are choosy about what it is that makes you cry, though.
No cannibalism, no brutal murders, nothing like that.”
As one anonymous screenwriter told Entertainment Weekly, “The first rule is snow.”
The source continued, “They can’t be waiting for the snow, there has tobesnow.
You cannot threaten them with no snow.”
A second writer added, “They always like Christmas activities like gingerbread-making contests, snowman-making contests.
The snow is as fake as it is essential.
“You’re sweating and trying to act cold.”
For example, you will see Christmas trees, but you won’t see crosses.
… Just have as many wreaths as possible, I can’t stress that enough.”
Director and writer Ron Oliver echoed this sentiment.
“There has to be Christmas in every scene, in every frame,” he told Bustle.
And, like everything in Hallmark-land, it’s completely by design.
Well, maybe a scene, but you could’t have a single act that doesn’t acknowledge it."
And that’s exactly why Hallmark Christmas movies are so … extremely Christmas-y.
“It’s the same kind of thing where they just overload it with whatever the seasonal thing is.
They like to hit you over the head with the seasonal club,” the writer added.
But structure takes on a new importance when it comes to Hallmark movies.
It makes the plots somewhat predictable, but that’s all part of the charm of Hallmark movies.
The structure can take some getting used to, though.
Once that structure becomes ingrained, churning out Hallmark movie scripts becomes second nature.
Everything goes through a mildness filter."
It’s like everything gets sanded, filed down so the sharp edges come off."
Don’t turn on Hallmark expecting to hear the F-word.
While all these writing rules sound a bit suffocating, the screenwriters are actually grateful to have some boundaries.
“It’s helpful in that you don’t have that many choices.
The blank piece of paper isn’t so blank.”
All Hallmark movies are designed to have a certain feel about them, particularly Christmas movies.
But there’s one thing you absolutely won’t see: sex.
Hallmark has a strict rule against sex scenes.
As one writer told Entertainment Weekly, “Any sexual is too sexual.”
They don’t want anything to offend anyone."
In general, there is not much PDA to be found in Hallmark movies.
And, of course, the smooches are reined in.
As screenwriter Joany Kane told Bustle, “We all know how the movie ends.
What makes these movies magic is the journey they take us on.
And Kane is right.
What other web connection is pulling in viewers in droves year after year for the same exact reason?
I think there’d be mass riots.”
